Draw a Pig! - Personality Test

Have fun, try out this personality check
http://www.freaknfunny.com/files/upload/draw-a-pig.swf

Pretty true for me...=)

Too late for regrets

Sometimes it is just too late for regrets. I know I should not have said certain things, but I did. So I have to live with the consequences. Such a dejavu feeling, cos I am always doing this.

I feel the weight of expectations on my frail shoulders. Will I be able to meet up to expectations? Will I be able to perform my role to others' and especially my own satisfaction...

I know I am too direct and that is a proven method to head to my own destruction at work. Perhaps I should not have such strong principles, but then, aren't accountants supposed to have strong moral values? Yes, but not based upon moral high ground.

Again, I am forced to reach the conclusion that I should just grow up in every aspect and that I should THINK before leaping. My temperament will lead me to my own death one of these days.

Sometimes it just ain't funny anymore.

Living in an Unfair World

The different people I meet
Come from various walks of life
On one hand, my friends are the rich, beautiful and powerful
Yet I know people at the other end of the spectrum
Who struggle with even their daily living
I straddle the middle path
Recognising the fates of the different types
When I complain, I feel guilty as I know there are worse off
When I don't, I feel that the world is unfair
Especially to those who aren't even given an opportunity
I know not what I can do
Except helping within my limited power
I know I am lucky in my own right
And yes, I should stop complaining
Alas, I can't seemed to stop pondering
About the unfairness of this world

Damned if I do, damned if I don't

(Long post...read when free.)

Is being temperamental a sign of a female? I have fallen into the abyss of misery or paisehness, from the pinnacle of feeling happy and satisfied.

Wed was the day of my division's retreat. We had spent the night before at the chalet. Was quite spooky and eerie, but quite fun. Slept only at 5+am, and that was because I know I had better sleep since I was the emcee for the event the next day.

This was the 1st time that I had stayed overnight at a chalet with my colleagues. Not a bad experience. Shared some of my inner secrets and feelings with them that I wun normally share in the office on a normal day.

Seriously speaking, I feel quite blessed to be in this organisation. Nobody judges me, or at least not to my face. And they accept me for who I am. They also told me that perhaps I have too many frens who are high-flyers, which is why I feel the pressure to constantly do well and even better. That perhaps unwittingly add to my pressure and unwillingness to face reality.

Anyway, the event on wed was quite informal, so being the emcee wasn't exactly stressful. Didn't even prepare for it, and everything was unscripted. Everyone was frenly, sporting and all. Just goodwilled banter that went on.

However, I may have been too frenly or playful for the whole day that I didn't know where to stop. After the big walk of 5km (I shall amaze my frens another time when I describe the total distance I walked), we went back to the chalet where a playful tussle awaited me. However, what has brought me crashing down to earth is cos tis guy tickled me at the armpit.

I noe we were all playing. But I still feel weird. I screamed the house down and everybody was laughing n all. Deep inside now, I feel strange. Like what I told everyone, there is an invisible line or society behaviours to be expected even when playing.

The big hoo ha was raised only after the event. I dun want to go into the details, but I believe that an apology wun b too much to ask for. Seriously, I dun noe wat I expect from tis, but I do noe I am feeling weird about tis whole ting, esp when I noe some people are saying that I overreacted.

When I saw the guy tis morn, I discovered that I didn't dare mit his eyes. I was act paiseh or shy. Amazing...no idea why too. I just know that I feel very down suddenly and it's not cos of PMS.

Maybe I should just shut up in future.

Warm Fuzzy Reunion

A friend is back from US and we met at her house over the weekend. A group of us sitted in the garden, reminiscing about the past..the days when we were still kids (but thinking we are adults). Periodically, laughter would be heard and I got this warm fuzzy feeling.

Despite additions to the group in the form of the partners, the mood was still one of familiarity, comfort and ease, despite not having met for a long time.

Indeed, everyone has grown up and have different worries now, ranging from the right job, appropriate job fit, satisfaction with life and of cos the more mundane one of studies, assignments and exams for the few guys who are still studying.

I wonder what we will think about when we look back on this period 10 years down the road. By then, I suppose we will be talking about the perils of married life, the terribly spoilt kids that we may inevitably bring up, the ageing process and whether we need botox etc.

It is really quite a good feeling, knowing that these are the people who sorta grew up together with me, whom I went overseas with, whom I can bank on not to laugh at me when I need them. Maybe it is all one-sided, maybe I am getting old, but I am really starting to believe in the lyrics of Weilian's song 朋友一直都在

Being a Realist or a Pessimist

I have been told that planning for the worst is simply pessimistic behaviour. My gut feel tells me that I am a realist though.

Shouldn't one prepare for the worst, so that come what may, my mental, physical, economic states are ready for the situation? Would I rather indulge myself in fairytale endings and happiness, only to find that all these are unattainable?

Even if I take a middle-of-the-road stand, I will be ill-prepared for the worst scenario simply because I disallow myself to think about it in the past. In my mind, it has already been ingrained in me to always think and be vigilant to all such possibilities.

To me, it is simply the bottom line that when the worst case scenario floats up to me, I will have the backbone to face it squarely, instead of crumbling down as I most probably would without prior thought to it.

I may be wrong, since so many people have told me that I think too much. Some others have advised me that I will fall into the vicious cycle of thinking of the worst so much, that I fall into the big black hole of the worst happening simply because I innately already willed it to happen.

Maybe all the above is true...but I thought this is the whole concept supporting the insurance industry.

Living an Ordinary Life

I miss the days of old
Frolicking at the playground with the neighbours' kids
At 5.45pm every weekday and sometimes, even the weekends

I remember
Plopping down on the kid-sized plastic chair
Armed with my bar of Nestle chocolate
To catch cartoons at my grandparents' house

I reminisce on my after school visits to the old Marine Parade library
Hand in hand with my dad
Then lugging back bags of storybooks to fill my days

All these and more in my memory bank of 23 years
My recollections of the good times...

I know not what the future may bring
Yet I am content to live a life
Ordinary by the standards of others
But extraordinary to me

A Nohari Window of my own

I am just too damned proud...Not only that, I am impulsive and god saves the other party when I am angry. I am such an obstinate bull, and an immature one at that. Childish!

I realise that it is only too easy for me to be used as a pawn and I warn others of falling prey too. Yet I do not know if I myself had fallen into the trap laid for me.

To top it all up, I cannot differentiate between who's good or bad and I fall into the big black hole of office politicking. Gawd, I hate this!

Please grant me tolerance, an even temper and peace of mind to get through all these ordeals.

Frenster Shock

Just added a fren to Frenster, and discovered that ALL my testimonials have disappeared for some reason! Has any of you suffered the same problem?

Results from my Johari Window - Predominantly SELF-CONSCIOUS

Arena (known to self and others) bold, cheerful, extroverted, friendly, self-assertive, self-conscious	Blind Spot (known only to others) able, adaptable, caring, clever, complex, dignified, energetic, happy, helpful, idealistic, independent, intelligent, kind, logical, observant, organised, proud, reflective, responsive, searching, sentimental, sympathetic, trustworthy, witty
Façade (known only to self)	Unknown (known to nobody) accepting, brave, calm, confident, dependable, giving, ingenious, introverted, knowledgeable, loving, mature, modest, nervous, patient, powerful, quiet, relaxed, religious, sensible, shy, silly, spontaneous, tense, warm, wise

Dominant Traits

63% of people agree that urnice is self-conscious

All Percentages

able (18%) accepting (0%) adaptable (18%) bold (18%) brave (0%) calm (0%) caring (36%) cheerful (27%) clever (9%) complex (9%) confident (0%) dependable (0%) dignified (18%) energetic (9%) extroverted (9%) friendly (9%) giving (0%) happy (9%) helpful (18%) idealistic (18%) independent (18%) ingenious (0%) intelligent (9%) introverted (0%) kind (9%) knowledgeable (0%) logical (9%) loving (0%) mature (0%) modest (0%) nervous (0%) observant (18%) organised (36%) patient (0%) powerful (0%) proud (18%) quiet (0%) reflective (18%) relaxed (0%) religious (0%) responsive (18%) searching (18%) self-assertive (9%) self-conscious (63%) sensible (0%) sentimental (36%) shy (0%) silly (0%) spontaneous (0%) sympathetic (9%) tense (0%) trustworthy (18%) warm (0%) wise (0%) witty (9%)

Created by the Interactive Johari Window on 5.3.2006, using data from 11 respondents.
You can make your own Johari Window, or view urnice's full data.

Wonder if being self-conscious is a good or bad thing..putting it positively, I check myself before allowing myself to make any mistakes. However, being overly self-conscious can only make me tiresome to be around. Does being self-conscious means I have a lack of confidence?

Strange!

Something happened yesterday that was weird.

From feeling guilty, I started to feel that there may be something seriously wrong with person #A.

It all started cos I said I felt guilty about something that I had unwittingly caused, which may cause problems to a 3rd party. #A replied to say that I should meditate on a sutra and find a way out. I seriously thought #A was joking, and I wanted to rebutt that if this is an idea of a joke...BUT next thing I knew, the sutra arrived in my sms inbox.

I decided then that there was nothing more I can say to #A since #A seemed on a different wavelength to mine.

However, later at night, #A msged me to ask if my guilt was misplaced since everything seemed fine. I replied, saying that it only APPEARS fine and that I was neverthless worried.

I was then told that I am a worrier, constantly worrying over non-existent things. And I quote..'So what's new?' #A said.

I was furious! I told #A in no uncertain terms that #A was in no position to judge. So be it. I can 'worry' what I want to, and #A can think as #A likes.

The reply? #A said #A is unqualified to judge and we should do what we may.

DUH -_- What a waste of my time and smses yesterday! It left me with a foul taste in my mouth and reminded me once again that some people are just weird.

But being the 'worrier' that I am, I have started to think if #A has a bigger problem than let on. #A sounded abnormal to me..I mean what kind of a person speaks like this? And #A was saying one nasty thing and then retracting it. It's weird..Is stress getting to #A or sth?

To end off:

'Open our hearts to the idea that there are those who are different'

&

'People need not become their illness.'

Cheers to a great day ahead!

Tuesdays with Morrie - Part 1

A friend recommended this book to me. I will definitely become a better and more satisfied person if I can put the nuggets of wisdom into practice.

Noteworthy Lessons/ Philosophies:

1. 'But the world did not stop, it took no notice at all'

- For us to remind ourselves that the world continues revolving and people still get on with normal life despite anything bad that may happen to us.

2. 'Why suffer in front of so many people? Stay at home. Get your affairs in order. But the idea of quitting did not occur..'

- To strive on despite everything

3. 'Accept what you are able to do and what you are not able to do.'

- Acceptance. Need I say more?

4. 'Accept the past as past, without denying it or discarding it.'

- To learn and move on.

5. 'Learn to forgive yourself and to forgive others.'

- To become a happier person.

6. 'Don't assume that it's too late to get involved.'

- There is always hope and opportunity if we only allow ourselves to see.

Part 2 tomorrow...